Monster Project: The Master Bathroom {A Retrospective}

You guys, I feel like the crowning achievement of this entire blog is about to be unveiled this week. It has been the plan from the second we bought this house to turn the half bath downstairs into a full bath, and it was one of the very first true renovation projects we undertook -- in that it wasn't just a coat of paint the made the room, but it was stripping it literally to its bones and then some to make the space what I envisioned. Because let's be real, this house is a real-life explosion of the fantasia inside my mind.

Of course, this whole thing would not be possible without the help of my husband, Second Wife, my brother, my brother's best friend, my mom, and most importantly my dad, for whom a plaque should be made and hung in commemoration because pretty much he financed all the plumbing for us -- and that's probably the most important part of having a functional bathroom, right?

Anyway, so first we're going to go waaaaaay back in time to September 2007 and work our way forwards so you all can see exactly how far we've come -- because if you think our bedroom is a big deal, well sweets, you're in for the ride of your life.

So, let's start from the view from what would become our bedroom door, into the far part of the bedroom and in through to the living room:

As we understand it, apparently once upon a time this room was actually the kitchen, and the cabinets on the right there are actual part of the old cupboards. So if they seem crazy, that's why.

The view of the sink, and memories of how thin I used to be:

The mirror there actually blocks the window behind it -- it was held onto the wall with a couple of bent nails.

The potty, which was a 180° from the previous photo:

There was a door that shut for the toilet, which would bang your knees if you were actually using the toilet. There was also a stick bolt on the OUTSIDE of the door, so, you know, you could lock people in if you so wanted. We used it mostly as cat time-out for the cat who can open doors. It was long gone before we had actual children to put in time-out, trust.

The sink top built upon another random cabinet. With peel-and-stick vinyl tiles as the countertop over plywood. You can imagine how well that held up.

And the ceiling, which won the award for the most mis-matched drop ceiling tiles in the whole house:

So this one is blurry, but it's of when my brother and Kyle closed off the passageway from the living room to the bathroom, and you can see snippets of the bedroom walls stripped of their plaster:

And here we have removed the cabinets and part of the closet and paneling, only to discover there was some gorgeous, albeit ruined, wallpaper underneath the paneling in that room:

Progress to show we've begun drywalling the bedroom, removed the hardwood down to the subfloor in the bathroom, and sanded the bedroom hardwood:

And then all the plaster was removed and made the room scary as fuck:

Seriously, it looked like we lived in a haunted house. This is about the time Kiedis was born.

A close-up of discovering that the peel-and-stick around the toilet was apparently not sticky enough, so Bondo was used to hold the tile down and OMFG AWFUL:

But we rallied and got that crap up.

Then it was time to remove the sink. I actually did this all by myself -- and it was about this time we'd moved our bed into the dining room so we could actually have room to work.

Cabinet gone:

And plaster gone:

I didn't know this at the time, but I was pregnant with Tova while I worked on this project. The week after I think is when the extreme exhaustion and vomiting sank in and I was so panicked about having breathed in lead paint dust. Mom guilt ahoy.

Another blurry take of getting drywall up in the bathroom part:

And mudding it:

And then the rest of the bathroom:

Over by the toilet plumbing:

Mudding:

More mudding:

Priming and proof that I can (barely) fit into shorts from middle school after having two babies (though, to be fair, I'm pretty much the same size now as I was in middle school. It was in high school that I was stupid scary thin):

Primed!:

And yes, that's Clementine hiding under that canvas tarp, but we'll get to her.


More priming, and cement board on the floor in preparation of tiling:

Just showing off my sweet exposed brick chimney:

 First coat of paint:

So much black:

Laying out the floor tile to get a feel for placement and cuts:

More of the same:

And ... well, you shouldn't be surprised by this, but if you want to see the crown jewel of my home, come back Thursday. You might need a glass of wine to accompany all of the sexification coming your way.